The One Question That Replaces Feedback Anxiety

"Do you have any feedback for me?"

This question fails almost every time. It puts the burden of bravery on the other person. They have to decide if it's safe, if it's worth it, if you'll really listen. Most stay quiet.

Here's the behavioral reframe that works:

"What's one thing I could do differently that would make your job easier?"

This question succeeds because it's:

• Specific (one thing, not a flood)
• Forward-looking (do differently, not what I did wrong)
• Benefit-framed (make your job easier, not criticize me)

The key insight from behavioral science: lower the psychological cost of the response. When you make feedback feel safe and contained, you get more of it.

Try it in your next 1:1. Don't fill the silence. Wait. The pause is uncomfortable, but that's where the honest answer lives.

The nudge: Use this exact question in your next meeting with a direct report. The phrasing matters because it shifts the emotional labor from them to you.